Passion

As they were shouting and throwing off their cloaks and flinging dust into the air… (Acts 22:23)

What a picture.  First century religious leaders responding to the Apostle Paul’s statement that he had been told to take the message of salvation to the Gentiles.  The Gentiles!  Talk about a passionate response.  With all the trappings of what passion must look like: noise, energy, physical activity.  The physical expression of a huge emotion.  The visible outpouring of one’s heart.

After I read this, I stopped to wonder where I see passion expressed in my very safe, cloistered world.  There may be some function of culture that tempers the expression of passion but even accounting for that, I had a difficult time identifying passion.  So much of what I see is surface – not very deep.  As my dad used to say, just hittin’ the high spots.

Oh, passion is often feigned especially when referring to self-stuff.  “I’ll just die if (fill in the blank here).”  That’s not passion.  That’s acting.  The face of a business person intent on the next big deal.  That’s not passion.  That’s greed.  “I will fight for my right to (fill in another blank here).”  That’s not passion.  That’s self-interest.

Even looking up the word in the dictionary doesn’t help much – except when you look at the synonyms instead of the definitions.  “fervor, zeal, ardor“.  Those are tasty words that ring of energy and blood and sweat and, well, passion.

So where do I see fervor and zeal and ardor?  Especially, where do I see them in myself.  Because at the end of it all, that’s really the only place I can truly identify an emotion with any level of accuracy.  Within myself.  What is important enough for me to take action – not for my personal agenda but for something bigger than me.  Those are tough things to think about but really necessary if I choose to do more than just skate safely along never veering near the edge of what might be possible.

Often they are tough to think about because they are also discouraging.  When one has a passion for feeding the hungry, it’s a bit daunting.  There are an awful lot of tummies in “the hungry”.  How can I even make a dent?  It’s why people will go to all sorts of lengths and spend all amounts of money to save a single dog trapped in a drain but feel paralyzed over how to impact the local animal shelter.  The single dog is personalizable (what if it were my dog?) and it is a one-shot event (there is a beginning and an end).  It’s hard to see an entire shelter full of dogs and think “what if all these were my dogs?” without also thinking “then I should have my head examined”.  It’s also hard to look at an entire shelter full of dogs knowing that this is an unending situation and need, and be able to commit to addressing it knowing that it is unending.

But I think it is important to identify something in your life about which you have fervor, zeal, ardor.  Life cannot have much meaning when it’s all about me all of the time.  That’s not why I believe we are here.  Now you can argue with me but this is a belief so it’s ok if we differ.

So what am I willing to shout about, to throw off my cloak and fling dust in the air over?  I’ve thought about this a lot for some time and it’s this:  clean water, education for girls, and financial freedom for women.  For me these are big areas in which my efforts can still make a difference.  They are also areas that are personal enough for me that I have some level of understanding what each of them means and how important they are to quality of life.

They also can take on different nuances when I take a closer look.  For example, I ran across a group that took a look at reasons why girls in Kenya missed school – to the point of having to drop out and not get an education.  One of the things they discovered was SO basic – something that I never thought about but which has a high dignity quotient:  availability of feminine hygiene supplies.  So Huru International is doing something about that and in the process also impacting financial freedom for the women in the villages directly.  Wow.

Kiva is a microloan organization that has an interesting model.  They work with local organizations to administer microloans; investors can decide which applicant they would like to help.  It’s kinda cool to know something about the person you are directly helping.

There are a number of organizations that work on clean water issues – I choose to work with World Vision and their water projects.

Don’t get me wrong – I’m still pretty focused on me.  And my family.  And my local community.  And what I’m going to fix for supper.  And those things are important and necessary.  But they aren’t bigger than me.  They are part of my everyday.  They are safe and don’t require a whole lot of stretching for me.  I really can’t say that I have much fervor, zeal or ardor about them even though I dearly love my family.

I’d like to be able to say that someday I’m going to exhibit the kind of fervor and zeal that caused Dr. Gary Morsch to start Heart to Heart International – a medical relief organization that does some amazing humanitarian work.  Or caused a young man named Daniel to organize the History Makers Church in Bryansk, Russia – a country full of people deeply searching for – and generally not finding – meaning.

Maybe.  Because I’d guess that both Dr. Morsch and Daniel aren’t a whole lot different than me except that they started taking baby steps and then took some big giant leaps right after their hearts.  I can do that.

What about you?  What causes you to shout and throw your cloak in the air and fling dust?  Find it.  Because the rest of us need you to show up with fervor and zeal and ardor.  Soon.